Winnie had conventional parents. In fact, they attended conventions all the time. It was at an Amway Convention that they abandoned her. Luckily she was come upon and taken in by a band of radical lesbian tupperware ladies who raised her as one of their own pups. Winnie learned their ways, romping and tumbling with the other tupperlings of the herd, until they lay in a satisfied pile, smiling and burping (their tupperware).

After a brief career as a governess for impressionable young children, Winnie moved into the performance world as a roadie for a heavy metal klezmer band (a period about which she will not willingly speak). Bitten now by the show business bug and with her youth solidly behind her, she waited for her opportunity and pounced upon it with gusto upon meeting the other girlz who were to become The Kinsey Sicks. It took several years for Winnie to get her chops, which she then immediately broiled and served to the audience on a bed of radicchio with garlic mashed potatoes and a horseradish coulis -- a feat that dazzled fans and critics alike.

Winnie sees herself as an old-fashioned girl, and yearns for the days before the Great Vowel Shift. For relaxation, she enjoys mah jongg, macrame and alphabetizing her recipes. Winnie briefly headed up a lesbian separatist clogger troupe, but found it too arduous to clean the footprints off her antique dhurrie rugs. Winnie is currently awaiting publication of her new Passover cookbook entitled I Can't Believe It's Not Chometz! The book's signature recipe is featured below:

WINNIE'S TEX-MEX MATZAH BREI!

1. Soak 3 pieces of matzah, crumbled, in milk for 10 minutes. Drain the milk and squeeze more liquid out with a paper towel. Set the softened matzah aside.


2. Finely chop a half of a red bell pepper and 2 scallions and saute briefly.


3. Mix 8 eggs. Add 1/2 cup of grated parmesan cheese, and salt, pepper and dried parsley to taste. Add matzah, peppers and scallions.


4. Saute together in a frying pan. You may scramble it or, if you have an iron skillet, you can saute it over an extremely low flame and then put in the broiler for no more than 30 seconds in order to make the matzah brei more of a frittata.


5. Serve with salsa, sour cream, warm tortillas (during Passover substitute a plate of matzah) and corn on the cob (during Passover substitute a plate of matzah). A shtikl avocado would be nice too.